Now that the kids have finished Trick or Treat, costumes are put away, and everyone has eaten way too much candy, everyone is making their holiday plans for Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s Eve. It’s time to buy Christmas cards, plan your holiday dinners using family recipes and make that big decision—does the Christmas tree get put up before or after Thanksgiving?

With families living all across the country, some families may not get to see each other as often as they would like. This may be the first visit with some of your family members since summer, or even this time last year. When arriving at your family’s home you may be surprised and even troubled at what you find. For those of us with aging parents and loved ones, it’s especially important to be on the lookout for signs of aging and clues that it may not be safe for your loved ones to be living alone.

Home Maintenance and Upkeep

When arriving at your loved one’s home, look at everything closely so you can determine if there are any areas of concern. Begin by looking at the exterior of the house.  How does the yard look?  Is it in need of care? Notice the contents of the mailbox.  Are there multiple days of mail still in the mailbox? What about newspapers? Are there bills piled up on the counter that haven’t been opened?

When you enter the house look closely at the surroundings as well as your loved ones. Is the living room or kitchen a mess?  Thinks to look for include piles of dirty dishes and clothes, basically anything that goes against the normal lifestyle of your family members. Don’t forget to check the bedroom. Is the bed unmade, when your mother always made her bed as soon as she got up?

Nutrition

Look very closely at the kitchen. Even more important than the cleanliness is the contents of the refrigerator and the cabinets. Ask yourself if there is sufficient, healthy food in the refrigerator? Is any of the food spoiled?  Could you make appropriate meals from what you found? When you sit down for a holiday meal, pay attention to the amount of food they are consuming. Are they eating an appropriate amount? Good nutrition is paramount to staying healthy for aging adults

Medication

Make sure to look at their medications, both over the counter as well as prescriptions.  Check the bottles to determine the quantity of medications and the date the prescription was written. Is there too much or too little medication in the bottle?  Has the medication expired? Improper medication management can lead to health problems and is a big safety concern.

Physical Safety

Watch how your loved ones move around their home. Are they having difficulties with walking, sitting down, or getting up from sitting? Check for potential obstacles or safety hazards like floor rugs or extension cords. Try to check their bathroom if possible. Look for safety concerns around the shower and the bathtub. Think about how they are getting in and out of the bathtub. Look for signs that they may not be bathing.

Tips for Handling Difficult Conversations

If you answered yes to any of the above questions, it might be time to have a conversation with your loved one. Chances are this will be a difficult and emotional conversation. Be sure to talk calmly with your loved one and try to gather as much information as possible from the conversation.  Watch and listen closely to determine if your family member understands what you are saying. Besides comprehension, can they hear you clearly?

If you are not an only child, it’s time to update your siblings on what you have learned. Understand this will be a difficult conversation as well.  Some of your brothers and sisters may have varying thoughts and opinions that are not the same as yours. Remember to have patience with your siblings.

Reassure your family members that they will have a support system every step of the way and encourage them to ask questions. It is essential that they feel secure and that you conduct an open dialogue about next steps. Consider their wishes when you discuss their future. Should they choose to move to a senior living community, it will be important for them to remain in a community with friends and family nearby.

Giving them time to process their thoughts is vital. Moving from their home whether it be to assisted living or possibly memory care, is a significant lifestyle change. Be patient and include them in the decision-making process if possible.

Explore Your Options

Moving to a senior living community can provide older adults with services and assistance with activities of daily living, as well as social opportunities. Many senior living communities offer regular activities for residents at all care levels. If your loved one can’t or doesn’t wish to remain at home, remind them of all the positive aspects of a senior living community.

If you discover that your loved one’s health has changed significantly while visiting this holiday season, it’s a possibility they are in need of moving to a senior living community that can provide care and offer assistance with their daily activities.  If you are considering moving your loved one to a senior living community, consider taking a tour of one of The Ohio Masonic Communities campuses. With three senior living communities across Ohio – Browning Masonic Community in Waterville, Ohio, Springfield Masonic Community in Springfield, Ohio, and Western Reserve Masonic Community in Medina, Ohio – each offers premier living options with exceptional experiences so older adults can live their best lives. If you are interested in learning more about one of our communities, give us a call at 1-877-881-1623 or schedule a visit.