In life we all go through phases of being cared for or caring for others. Being a caregiver is broad. It could be short term or long term. It could be infrequent, such as a couple times a week or a few minutes a day, or more frequent all the way up to 24/7. No matter how often care is provided, or for how long, caregiving can be both rewarding and stressful.

The Basics: What is caregiving?

When it comes to caregiving, the types of care provided can usually be lumped into one of two categories. Activities of daily living (ADLs) and instrumental activities of daily living (IADLs). For both categories, the amount of assistance a caregiver provides can range from light help to full assistance.

Activities of Daily Living (ADLs)

These are the basic activities we all do every day. ADLs include showering or bathing, dressing, using the bathroom, and moving around. A caregiver may provide assistance with all of these tasks, a few of these tasks, or only one. For example, someone may need a caregiver to assist them with bathing to ensure they don’t fall, but is able to use the bathroom and move around on their own.

Instrumental Activities of Daily Living (IADLs)

Like ADLs, these are things we may all do every day, but they’re focused less on personal care tasks. IADLs include things like medication management, laundry, cleaning, and meal preparation. Someone may need help with IADLs before, or after, they need help with ADLs. Needing a caregiver to help with laundry or cleaning doesn’t mean help is needed with any of the ADLs. In fact, independent living communities frequently offer assistance with most IADLs but never assist with ADLs.

Who are caregivers?

There are two main types of caregivers. Paid and family. Paid caregivers are people hired specifically to provide care. This is typically just for ADLs. While you can hire someone to handle IADLs, it is not typically thought of as a caregiver since they aren’t providing personal care. Consider anyone who hires someone to clean their house. You might think of them as a housekeeper or a cleaner, but probably don’t consider them to be a caregiver.

Family caregivers can be a broad category and includes anyone providing care to someone they know. Most frequently, this is either a spouse or an adult child. However, it can also include other family members and even friends. Family caregivers can be paid, but more often than not they provide care for free. When a family member is assisting with IADLs for a loved one, it is also more likely to still be seen as a caregiving role.

Challenges of Being a Caregiver

There’s a lot of good that can come from being a caregiver. But, like many things in life, it doesn’t come without challenges. Understanding the challenges you may face as a caregiver can help you prepare for them.

Relationship Changes

Being a caregiver to a family member can be challenging because of the strain it can put on your relationship. This is because you begin to play multiple roles for each other. You’re still “family” but now you’re also “caregiver.” This is a two way street and can be just as challenging for the person receiving care to adjust to as it is for the person providing care. It can be helpful to focus on the family relationship, such as daughter or spouse, and prioritize it as much as possible. The role of caregiver is second to that of family.

Relationships don’t just change for the caregiver and the person they’re caring for though. The strain can extend much deeper into other parts of the family. For example, if it’s a spouse that is the caregiver, they may find that it strains their relationship with their adult children. If it’s an adult child who is the caregiver, it can add strain to their relationship with their siblings and their own spouse and kids. If you’re a caregiver, be mindful of the way it impacts all of the relationships in your life.

Caregiver Burnout

This is one of the most talked about parts of being a caregiver. It’s also one of the least understood and most ignored. As the saying goes, “you can’t pour from an empty cup.” While cliché, it is true. For caregivers, burnout is the empty cup.

Essentially, caregiver burnout is a point of physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion. Burnout affects everyone differently. It can also be experienced at different times and to different severities. Sometimes it could be triggered by an acute event like a hospitalization, but other times it can gradually build.

The symptoms of burnout are different for everyone. Some caregivers may notice things like exhaustion, irritability, or difficulty sleeping. Other possible effects of burnout might include anxiety and depression, appetite changes, and physical health conditions like high blood pressure. It’s important for caregivers to be in tune with their wellness and notice when they’re experiencing changes that could be a sign of burnout.

Resources for Caregivers

To go back to the saying “you can’t pour from an empty cup,” caregivers need to take care of themselves. It’s also important to know they can’t do it all themselves. Thankfully, there are resources available that can support caregivers take care of themselves and the person they care for.

Self-Care

One of the best ways caregivers can fight burnout is self-care. Even though self-care has become a buzzword, it’s one of the best things a caregiver can do. For caregivers, this is more than a spa day to relax. It’s finding things that bring peace and promote wellbeing. These suggestions all require time, but it’s important that caregivers make time for themselves.

1. Therapy – Talking to a therapist is a great way for caregivers to take care of themselves. It offers an outlet for talking about the things bothering them and can help them learn strategies for things like changing the way they think and calming anxiety.
2. Support Groups – Like therapy, a support group can offer a caregiver an outlet to talk about the things going on in their lives. It also can be a chance to connect with other caregivers and feel less alone. Caregivers in a support group can also be a great source of ideas, suggestions, and resources for caregiving.
3. Physical or Creative Outlets – everyone needs an outlet. This is different for everyone but it could be things like reading, going to the gym, crafting, walking, or baking. It can be anything that helps them relax. This can be one of the hardest things to make time for, but the most beneficial for feeling at peace.
4. Household Support – Caregivers can’t do it all. It can be helpful to identify what things can be given to someone else to do. For example, a caregiver may be feeling overwhelmed trying to care for their loved one and also maintain their own home. Hiring someone to clean their house could be an easy solution to alleviate one of their stressors. Bonus, going home to a clean house can also help with relaxation.

Caregiving Assistance

Like we’ve said, caregivers can’t do everything alone. Sometimes they need help in their personal lives to manage being a caregiver. Other times, it may make more sense to get help with caregiving. There is no right or wrong choice to be made here. It all comes down to what is best for each person, family, and situation. This is also a decision that can change over time.

1. Adult Day Services – This is frequently referred to as an adult day center or adult daycare. It’s a place for the older adult to go during the day and receive help with their activities of daily living while socializing with others. It also gives the caregiver a chance to work, go to appointments, or take care of themselves. The services can range from a few hours a month to several hours a day, several days a week depending on the caregivers needs and the facility’s options.
2. Respite – Temporary care for an older adult that provides a break for their primary caregiver is known as respite. Typically, when referring to respite care, we’re talking about 24/7 care or assistance being provided for a short period of time, such as a few days or a few weeks. There are many reasons someone may choose respite care, but it can provide caregivers a break or just be a resource when extra help is needed temporarily.
3. The Ohio Masonic Communities Resource Center – We have our own division focused on connecting adults over the age of 55 with the resources and services they need to thrive. We’re here to answer questions, offer support, help you find resources, and connect you with local services to support you.  We have Community Outreach Coordinators throughout the state who can help you over the phone or in person.

At The Ohio Masonic Communities, we pride ourselves on supporting not only our residents, but also caregivers. With options for respite care and the resources available through The Ohio Masonic Communities Resource Center, we want caregivers to feel supported as they navigate the caregiving journey. We have three senior living communities across the state of Ohio – Browning Masonic Community in Waterville, Ohio, Springfield Masonic Community in Springfield, Ohio, and Western Reserve Masonic Community in Medina, Ohio. If you are interested in learning more about our respite care options, or would like to connect with our resource center, give us a call at 1 (877) 881-1623 or contact us here.